So I lied, and didn’t keep the one resolution I had. I’M SORRY. We’ve literally been fighting off illness after illness, and I’m close to burning the house down. I went back and looked at the calendar and we’ve been sick since December 2. DECEMBER 2. That’s 57 days. FML. Hand, foot, and mouth (we … [Read more…]

New Year, Not so New me…

I learned a while ago that I just wasn’t cut out for New Year’s resolutions. And trust me, I’ve done them all. Sober January. The Whole30. Starting an intense work-out regiment. Trying not to swear. Giving up caffeine. You see, all these things sound good in theory, but in reality, they made me a not … [Read more…]

The Bullsh*t

It may sound harsh but my tolerance for unnecessary bullshit has rapidly declined since I became a Mom. I think to outsiders it may appear that I have become selfish but I’m at a point in my life where I’m just trying to keep my head above water. And be the best mother I can be. … [Read more…]

The Big Kolache

My family doesn’t have family members, we have characters. When my family walks into an event, you  are keenly aware. My sister in law, who has just relocated from Thailand, has nicknamed us the “Kolache Family” because well, we love kolaches. And sausage. And beer. My dad is specifically called the “Big Kolache.” I’m not … [Read more…]

Girl Scout Cookie Emergency

We just had an emergent situation at my house: We realized that it’s the last day to purchase girl scout cookies. Usually we are on our game but for some reason this season we just don’t have our shit together and haven’t had one single, delicious bite of cookie goodness. It’s shameful. It was Sunday … [Read more…]

Mom Bun Down

  I have made a decision. I have decided that its time for shit to get real and get my “hotness” back. I have just faced the harsh reality that I have fallen into the dreaded “Mom” category where my go to outfit is yoga pants and a sweatshirt and I don’t even do yoga. … [Read more…]