Holiday Hangover

It feels like something with the Holidays just didn’t jive this year. Something was off. I cannot pinpoint the exact reason but there was for sure something in the air this year, and I know I wasn’t the only one who felt it, because every friend that I spoke to shared in my misery. It’s like no one got it right, which is baffling because I have some pretty amazing, over-the-top, Martha Stewart like friends. But even they were in a slump. It’s like the harder I tried to get it together and spread some holiday cheer, the more things fell apart. And they fell apart tremendously. It’s almost as if Christmas was not supposed to happen for us this year.

I am in no way saying I have it together any other year, because I absolutely do not. Baking, crafting and spreading cheer don’t exactly come natural to me, but I am someone who is able to put their best foot forward, and fake it until they make it over the Holidays. I would actually say I fake it VERY WELL.

I think this year was hard for me because of all the change that was going on. I’m not good with change or being out of control, and between having a newborn, recovering from a major surgery, and trying to take care of my insanely wild 4 year old, I was spent, and all out of holiday cheer way before Thanksgiving rolled around. It’s almost comical the series of event that occurred while I was trying to deck the halls. My blunders were so bad they are somewhat comical but hey, I’m a new mom and I get to ride that “excuse train” for at least another 6 months. Am I right?

I didn’t bring plan or bring anything to the my son’s Holiday party.

I usually plan his class party, bake all sorts of treats and do everything I can to make it special. This year I did nothing. I showed up, sat in a chair the entire time, and fed my newborn. Thank gosh I have the best moms in my son’s class who don’t judge me or at least don’t openly judge me. And to top it off, I accidentally re-gifted my son’s teacher’s gift and she totally called me out. Note to self: when re-gifting, make sure there isn’t a tiny card hiding in said gift from the previous recipient. Epic mom fail.

We didn’t get a tree until 7 days before Christmas.

Usually we set up are tree the day after Thanksgiving. We have even been known to go cut down our own tree at a one of those Christmas tree farms. This year, I just couldn’t. I fought tooth and nail to get a fake tree because the thought of cleaning up any pine needles after being up all night with a newborn was enough to send me to the nut house.

The elf moved a total of 5 times, mostly from shelf to shelf.

My son kept asking why the elf wasn’t moving like he usually did. Well he is angry because you don’t eat your broccoli, you don’t go to bed why we tell you to and you argue about putting on your shoes every-freaking-day. He said that Santa would bring him presents anyway. When he is right he is right. It actually takes more energy to not buy gifts and explain why then to just give the ones you already purchased. I gave up on Christmas and good behavior, and so did that elf, so he stayed on the shelf for most of his 30 days.

Christmas Eve was a disaster.

On Christmas Eve I planned this amazing night where my son was going to participate in the Christmas pageant at the church and then we would go to this fabulous restaurant, where I actually was on my game and made reservations 3 weeks in advance (it’s funny how I step up to the plate when something involves eating a nice meal). Well, we ended up being late to church and all the parts for the pageant had been given to kids who were on time AND I made reservations at the wrong restaurant location, which was 30 minutes away. My son ended up throwing a massive tantrum through the entire church service because he had to watch all of his friends participate in the nativity scene without him, and we went to eat at a very questionable Mexican restaurant that may or may not have given the family food poisoning.

Which leads me to my next point….

We got sick.

I started to feel sick about 7 pm on Christmas Eve and I went straight to bed when I got home. It turns out that I had strep throat. If you haven’t had strep throat as an adult, let me tell you it is a hell-of-a-painful. As I was in bed crying like a baby and praying that God would just take me, my husband knocked on the door and said that our son was barfing uncontrollably. Merry Christmas to us!

We had no food to eat on Christmas Day.

Since we had planned to have Christmas dinner at my aunt’s house I didn’t go to the grocery or cook anything for Christmas. And it turns out when you tell people you are sick, they aren’t as eager for you to come over and spread your germs all over their house. So we ate whatever I could rummage from the fridge on Christmas day, alone at our house.

I forgot to order my husband a gift.

Yes, you heard me. I had gift for everyone this year EXCEPT my husband. It was not intentional or a reflection of our marriage, I simply just forgot. And when I saw the four presents that he had for me under the tree, already wrapped, it put me in a tail-spin. I just read an article that pregnancy brain is a real thing and can stick with you for a long time after you deliver, maybe even life. So I’m claiming that, “life long pregnancy brain.” Sorry honey, your present this year was our baby. Joy to the world.

So just know if the holidays sucked ass this year and feel like you fell short as the matriarch of the family, you are not alone. The holidays are never easy but I think all the drama in 2016 made it that much harder. The stars just didn’t align and that is ok. We always have next year to get it together and start planning early for extra special holiday cheer. This week I’m just going to embrace my holiday hangover. And start planning our trip to the Caribbean for next year, because in Jamaica no one cares about a Christmas tree, a Christmas pageant or the elf on a shelf. They just care about how much rum you want in your punch.